Newsletter Archive

Many years ago, in my entertaining roster of memories, I learned a valuable lesson, one I wish to pass along to you!  When you invite guests to your house for dinner (or any meal for that matter), once they accept, I urge you to then ask them “THE question”: “Do you have any food allergies or dislikes?!” Oh boy, I learned this the hard way. At one of our first big dinner parties Stuart and I hosted years ago, I made my foolproof beef tenderloin with a bearnaise sauce… divine, right? Well, JUST as our ten guests were seated at the table and dinner was being served, one couple announced that they were vegetarians! Really? Why did they not advise me of this when they accepted my invitation? It is the guest’s responsibility to tell the host. What did I do? It just so happened that I had a box

Last week I touched on reciprocation, “the forgotten art of hospitality,” and you, my dear subscribers, are passionate about it! I received more letters than ever in favor of this simple principle of giving and receiving… and the lack of it in today’s society. Today, I am featuring just a few heartfelt notes I received to confirm that you are not alone; reciprocity reflects the basic human desire to create a sense of balance and fairness in our social interactions!  And it does not have to cost a fortune to reciprocate hospitality. Take a peek… Dear Holly, This topic never seems to be discussed—thank you for sharing your commentary.  I, at one time, thought I had too many expectations for reciprocation. However, as my mother would say, it is simply “good form” to return a lovely time with a lovely time.  It is the ultimate thank-you note and an acknowledgment of

(Dress is Ala von Auersperg)  A darling subscriber brought up an interesting topic: the “unwritten rule” of reciprocating hospitality. Is it a lost art? Reciprocation, a gracious social norm, involves returning a favor or invitation.  It is an essential aspect of friendship. However, it is often overlooked in today’s society. I am speaking about social events, not business, and in particular, an intimate dinner party, not necessarily a large cocktail party or reception. My subscriber shared her personal experience: she and her husband have invited and hosted several couples to their dinner parties, who seemed to enjoy themselves thoroughly. However, over time, to their surprise, these guests have yet to extend an invitation in return. It is not because they didn’t have a delightful time; they gleefully accepted their invitations on more than one occasion! Why? I remember when a dear friend of mine, who has a very grand house and

Cooking seafood in our apartment is a bit of a challenge compared to cooking seafood in our house, as the fishy aroma can linger for days. Even though the sliding doors are opened, and scented candles are lit, it does not seem to dissipate! So, when making a lobster bisque, I take an easy, “scent-free” shortcut! I buy it ready-made and add my special touches to make it “semi-homemade.” There are several places to buy yummy, premade lobster bisque that is refrigerated (and not in a can), such as Publix, Panera, and Costco. I simply add some Madeira wine to taste, along with a shake or two of red pepper flakes, to the store-bought bisque, slowly bring it to a simmer, and add “the secret” dollop of crab or lobster. My “Secret” Ingredients Mix and simmer until warm: Premade and refrigerated Lobster Bisque Madeira Wine (to taste) Pepper flakes (to taste) Add

When composing an invitation, which side do you place the acknowledgment request, aka the R.s.v.p. (R.s.v.p. is French for “Respondez s’il vous plait”)? On the lower-right corner or the lower-left corner? It should be on the lower-left corner of the invitation! Respondez s’il vous plait may be written as R.s.v.p., with a capital “R” and lowercase “s.v.p.” The other form of R.S.V.P. is in all capital letters. The preferred form is R.s.v.p. “The favour of replay is requested” is another form of an acknowledgment request. It relays a touch of old-world charm and formality to the occasion. I chose this for my wedding reception invitation because the British spelling of “favour” reminded me of my dear father, who was British. It is appropriate to use the simple phrase “Regrets only” along with a phone number, email address, or both. This form is considered less formal than using R.s.v.p. When including

If paired well, porcelain and art can create a symphony of perceptible bliss for any room. Porcelain plates, vases, cachepots, and figurines add a lovely dimension to walls, shelves, and tabletops, enhancing the room’s character and artwork. When porcelain pieces are chosen to complement a piece of art with specific colors in mind, the porcelain becomes part of the overall composition, and the artwork visually extends rays of intrigue toward a nearby piece of porcelain.  Thus, the entire composition expands and enhances viewers’ pleasure. A win-win!  This is a sound reason to buy what you love while keeping a room’s color scheme in mind. My favorite artwork at Hill-Stead Museum in Farmington, Connecticut, is Jockeys (1886) by Edgar Degas, which hangs over the dining room mantel. The mantelpiece is graced with the Pope Family collection of celadon porcelain pieces made during the Song (960-1279) and Ming (1368-1644) Dynasties. The mantelpiece