What a privilege it was to speak and be feted so graciously by my dear friend and Madame President, Hunter Gundlach, of the Tuckahoe Woman’s Club. Nary a mobile phone in sight!
Oh, how glorious it is to be connected to anyone, at just about any time, from a mobile phone. It is paramount, however, to use it while not imposing on others.
Just recently, I had the honor of giving a talk at the prestigious Tuckahoe Woman's Club in Richmond, Virginia. They entertained me royally with their gracious, southern hospitality. It was a privilege to speak to an audience of 600 ladies who dressed in pink in my honor! Several lovely members were my appointed hostesses. They chauffeured me, hosted a dinner at the Commonwealth Club (crab cakes to die for!) and introduced me to the members at their club. Not once did I see any of these ladies take out their mobile phones, other than to take a photograph... truly!
How refreshing it was to see all of these ladies living in the moment. And, granted, we were at two private clubs where mobile phones are not permitted, but even so, no one even took a quick peek while speaking with me outside or in the car. These are busy, successful women! As my husband will attest, I need to work on this myself! So, I was inspired to write about mobile phone etiquette.
Do not be tempted to chat on your mobile phone in a restaurant, church, theatre, private party, business function, or indoors in general! As much as you think you are speaking softly, you will almost always underestimate how loudly you are speaking since the phone is cupped to your ear.
When dining, try not to place your phone on the table, unless you have a reason that you must be available such as for children, medical reasons, or other significant situations. If your phone vibrates in your pocket or handbag, then you can excuse yourself and step outside to a place you will not be within earshot of others.
When in a public area, try not to talk in anything other than a whispered voice. Nothing is worse than overhearing the conversation of someone on the phone next to you on a train, plane, or even around a hotel pool!
This is applicable when you are in the company of someone, and especially if you are driving a car, or are a passenger: be courteous and ask if the other person does not mind if you make a call, or check your messages. It is disconcerting for a driver to see the passenger totally engaged in their cell phone email messages, without acknowledging them with, “Please excuse me for a moment. I need to check my emails quickly, would you mind?” Otherwise, the driver, passenger or person feels ignored, slighted, and sometimes very insulted.
When leaving a message, it is always thoughtful to leave your name and phone number on an answering machine. This is especially courteous for a new acquaintance, so that they will not have to look up your number.
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Forbidden Faux Pas
No-no: To assume someone can chat when you call.
What is done: It is always thoughtful to ask if it is an appropriate time for them, or inquire, "Can you talk now?" By asking, it allows the other person to let you know if they are busy or wish to call you back at another time.
No-no: To assume that someone can have a personal chat at work.
What is done: Keep your conversation to the point.
No-no: To hang up without a proper goodbye.
What is done: It may take a moment to excuse yourself, whether you are late for an appointment, a child, or anywhere else, but just hanging up abruptly is off-putting to anyone.
No-no: To ring people in different time zones and not be aware of their time.
No-no: To make a personal phone call before 8:30 am, or after 9:00 pm, or during meal times. Time consideration may be different for family members, who you know are liable to be up and ready to chat!
No-no: To use your phone at any time while in an interview or in a classroom.
Are there other mobile phone nuances that you find bothersome and need to be addressed? Please let me know, and perhaps I will compose Part II on this topic. Oh, it was lovely chatting with you…. good-bye! Tah Tah!