Do you need to sing for your supper? Oh yes, indeed you do!
As a guest, you are being treated to dinner, and your host is going out of their way to entertain and nourish you with their gracious hospitality, food, and drink. A proper guest knows how to acknowledge and show gratitude by being engaging and conversational with the other guests, as well as polite and appreciative. It is up to you to contribute to the evening by being charming with your conversation and joviality, especially if you want to be invited back! Nothing is worse than a guest who expects to be entertained or is a bore.
Protocol for a proper dinner guest:
Respond to an invitation within 48 hours or sooner! This affirms how enthused you are to attend.
Hosts go to great lengths to choose an invitation for an event. When you open up a stunning invitation, remark on it. It is music to the ears of the hosts to learn that a guest is pleased to have received the invitation.
If you have allergies, food dislikes, or are a vegan or vegetarian, let the hostess know in advance of the party. This is your obligation as a good guest.
When you bring a gift to a party, do not expect the hostess to open it then.
If you bring a gift bottle of wine, do not expect or ask for it to be served. The host has already chosen the appropriate wines to complement the dinner.
If you are unsure what the dress code is, ask the host in advance.
Know when to leave! This is paramount. You may think that you are the life of the party, but do not assume that your hosts want you to stay until the wee hours.
If you are the guest of honor, it is up to you to leave first and say your adieu, so the other guests may leave after you. Remember, if your hosts genuinely want you to stay longer, they will convince you to do so!
As a guest, take a moment to show your gratitude. Dinner parties take considerable effort to execute, so be the first to put pen to paper and write a meaningful thank you note (not an email!) to the host. Remark on specific details and efforts which made the evening magical and memorable.
Forbidden Faux Pas:
No-no: Forgetting to R.s.v.p. in advance of the party date.
No-no: Bringing a guest without getting approval from the host well in advance.
No-no: Changing your place card from where it was placed to a different spot on the table.
A host puts thought and consideration into how guests will be seated, even if it is a small gathering, so never be tempted to move your place card.
Grandmillennial Tip:
If you bring flowers to a dinner party, bring them in a vase so that the hostess does not have to leave her guests to arrange them. Having flowers delivered earlier in the day, or even the day before, is always a thoughtful gesture. If you do not know the color scheme of the host's house, send white flowers… a safe choice any time of the year!
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Holly