A springtime place setting at Fox Hall. The dessert fork is facing to the right, and the dessert spoon is facing to the left. Notice how both ends are not equally aligned with one another.
Thanksgiving is approaching, and yummy desserts are guaranteed to be served!
When you see a dessert fork and spoon placed at the top of your plate, do you know the proper way to hold them?
Most people do not! They tend to pick up just one utensil, the fork, and then leave the spoon on the table. Truth be known, the appropriate way is to hold both pieces of flatware, simultaneously!
The fork is held in your left hand, and the spoon in your right hand. With the fork in your left hand, have the fork tines face down. The fork is a "pusher,” used to place/push the dessert into the spoon. One then eats from the spoon, not the fork, as seen in this Instagram video.
So, if the fork and spoon are centered and placed above the dinner plate, which goes on top?
The spoon is on top and faces to the left. The fork is on the bottom, closest to the plate, with the prongs facing to the right. Here is how I remember the placement: The fork prongs face to the right, away from your heart. You don’t want to poke your heart! And a spoonful of sugar points toward your heart and represents a “sweetheart!”
Would you like to be privy to a significantly refined “sweet secret?”
While arranging "a romantic dinner for two" for my book, The Pretty & Proper Living Room, in the living room at Fox Hall, a dear friend and consummate British gentleman, popped in to say hello and glanced at my place setting. He politely suggested a slight adjustment and gently moved the dessert spoon and fork, infinitesimally sideways, so they did not line up precisely on top of one another. "This enables your guest to pick up the spoon without the possibility of the fork pricking the right hand,” he explained, “a refined and regal gesture.”
Rarely will you see the dessert fork and spoon placed above the plate in regal residences in England. It is considered to be “restaurant-style” to do so. Instead, the dessert fork and spoon align with the rest of the flatware on either side of the plate. (The dessert spoon is placed closest to the plate on the right, and the dessert fork just to the left of the plate.) But Buckingham Palace now places them above the plate instead of to the side of the plate, as a nod to the international placement form.
A place setting in the stunning State Dining Room at Blenheim Palace in Oxfordshire, England, has the dessert fork directly next to the plate on the left. To the right of the plate, the dessert spoon has a small knife between the plate and the spoon, perhaps for cheese as the last course. The episode for my public television series, You Are Cordially Invited is here.
Forbidden Faux Pas:
No-no: To refer to the sweet course as “dessert” in England!
What is done: Dessert is ALWAYS referred to as “pudding!”
No-no: To delight in your dessert before the hostess (or host) picks up their spoon and fork first.
Sweet talk! Dessert is the best part of any meal, and eating it with the proper etiquette is like icing on the cake… or pudding, as the Brits would say!
Xx
Holly