Wish Granted!

What is it called when you have a plan that exceeds your expectations? I think it is “a wish granted, a dream come true,” like this moment at Blenheim Palace. 

Last week, Stuart and I had the honor of Chairing “Live Royally!” an extraordinary five-day event that CEO.org (Chief Executives Organization) hosted in England for only 34 members/spouse attendees. Drawing from my experience filming my PBS TV series in England, I was inspired to create a regal yet entertaining and informative experience. The challenge was on! 

Stuart and I landed in London a few days early to be on our game and adjust to the time. A driver picked us up at Heathrow (4 a.m. our USA time). As we drove toward London, he politely announced, “Mr. and Mrs. Holden, the King is passing us presently on the right side of our vehicle.”  Really? OH, my! There he was in a handsome Rolls with two police escorts. Right on cue, this set the scene perfectly for “Live Royally!”

We arrived at the glorious Dorchester Hotel and ate a petite breakfast in the lobby. A few moments later, I was off to meet Elizabeth Gage. There was no time to change, so wake up, Holly… two pots of tea, please!   (I am wearing the “Paley Jacket”)

Elizabeth Gage creates uniquely bespoke, hand-made, stunning jewelry; her boutique is in elegant Belgravia, London. Her pieces are exhibited in museums and feted worldwide. She received an M.B.E. from the Late Queen Elizabeth II.  (See “Welcome New Sponsor” below) It has been a few years since we last saw one another at a dinner party we hosted for her at Fox Hall. How exciting to see her again… jet lag was not an option!

The next day, it was time to focus on our “Live Royally” event! We were excited to execute our plan after taking two “scout trips” to England with Stacy Bailine, the ultimate and extremely professional Director of Events for CEO.org. Off to Cliveden House to commence the event!

Thanks to the CEO.org “Dream Team: Stacy, Sarah, and Payton,” every detail was executed like “Big Ben” clockwork! Our 34 attendees were charming and enthusiastic, traveling from Canada, Hong Kong, and the USA… we adored them all! Our educational resources were brilliantly insightful, the venues splendid, and the cuisine yummy!  The British weather? Blue skies and puffy white clouds. It was all magical if you ask me!

Thank you, Tim and Louise, International CEO Chairs, for inviting and trusting us to Chair this event! The tagline “only-in-CEO experiences” rang true each day. To name a few: wine tasting and dinner at Baron Alfred de Rothschild’s Waddesdon Manor, a book discussion with the Duchess of Rutland, Emma Manners, luncheon with Lady Camoys at her family home Stoner Park, a luncheon with Peter and Eleanor Buxton at their home Kirtlington Park, an engaging talk from The Royal Butler- Grant Harrold, and cocktails with the Earl and Countess of Carnarvon at Highclere Castle. The grand finale? A pink-themed dinner/dance at Blenheim Palace.

When we pulled up to the magnificent Blenheim Palace, a UNESCO site, my heart went pitter-patter; I consider Blenheim Palace the most important and significant palace in the world.  Lady Henrietta Spencer-Churchill, my dear friend and the elder daughter of the 11th Duke of Marlborough, greeted every guest as they entered the Great Hall, introducing them to her family home.  She just penned her 12th book,  Blenheim: 300 Years of Life in a Palace, which will debut in September 2024.  We filmed a PBS episode together at Blenheim.   (I am wearing my newest creation from Gramercy Atelier’s Holly Holden Collection.) 

As we departed Blenheim Palace at midnight, to my surprise, the exterior was lit up in pink… a Cinderella moment!

“Live Royally” was officially over. We spent the last two days in London for R&R at the glorious Goring Hotel. We took a walk toward Buckingham Palace, next to the Goring Hotel, when a darling, 30-something young lady walked past, stopped, turned around, and took a second glance. “I read your newsletters- You’re Holly Holden!” Maybe it was my bright pink coat. Whatever it was, I am in awe of how gracious my subscribers are. Thank you for introducing yourselves to me worldwide and allowing me to share my experiences with you. How VERY fortunate I am to have an audience who shares the same appreciation for a genteel way of life. Long live gracious tradition!

In summation, “Live Royally” was a dream come true.  My wish was granted!

xx

Holly

Some of your best ideas may come while on holiday!

Secrets to Lovely Living endeavors to cover topics I hope will enrich your life. With that in mind, I am honored to present my daughter, Alexandra, to you. She just may enhance your life! Thank you for indulging me.

Vacation gives you time to start implementing simple micro habits, to think about navigating a career move or even pushing out of your comfort zone and finally starting that business you’ve been contemplating!

This summer, if you're pondering questions about your present status, future, or workplace challenges (universal concerns), or if you know someone who is, you may wish to consider hiring a coach. From recent college graduates to established CEOs, we all face challenges at some point. 

My daughter, Alexandra Terhalle, is a University of Cambridge-certified Coach dedicated to helping professionals all over the world, at all levels, find clarity and purpose, unlocking their unlimited potential. Her expertise, which includes Executive Coaching, Relocation Coaching, and Career and Confidence Coaching, is a testament to her ability to catalyze growth and inspiration with transformative coaching. 

An accomplished coach can be extraordinary for your personal growth. Alexandra’s  portfolio includes international executives from Fortune 500 companies (Apple, Google, MARS, 3M, American Express, etc.). She coaches worldwide on Zoom from her office in Berlin, Germany. 

If you know someone ready to grow exponentially, please do consider passing along Alexandra’s website. I was lucky enough to have her coach me… and she helped me find the courage to accomplish many of my personal and professional goals! 

May summertime give you time to reassess your goals, where ever you are! 

Xx

Holly

PS “Freebie!” 15 BEST BOOKS to Inspire You This Summer, click here! 

The Powder Room: A Perfect Place for Artwork!

Besides the pretty celadon green striped wallpaper by Brunschwig & Fils, the decorative aspect of this charming Powder Room is the artwork.  I have admired this Powder Room, which belongs to dear friends, because it is adorned with art that is meaningful to them.  The medley of assorted silhouettes and miniatures, collected in London by their family years ago, adds to the room's charm.  The history of each piece has been dutifully recorded on the backside, which is a smart idea.  The two seashell gouaches are by artist John Gould, the “Audubon of Australia.”

Consider adding even more charm to your Powder Room walls with lovely artwork.    

Typically, most guests do not expect to discover important artwork in a Powder Room!  While silver picture frames, replete with meaningful photographs, pique the curiosity of your guests in other rooms, pretty Powder Rooms can be the perfect backdrop to display some of your most alluring artwork for guests to admire unexpectedly... albeit privately!  

Both photographs and artwork are what I refer to as “subtle bragging rights.” Nothing is overtly prominent but, instead, discreetly intriguing to others.  Photographs in your house offer a peek at important moments.  Artwork, especially in a Powder Room, can be a surprise, revealing your interests, family background, or personal stories. 

A Powder Room is intended for guests.  This is where ladies powder their noses and apply pink lipstick… in private. Think of the walls as premium space to be clever and reveal your treasures, whether lavish or simply what you hold dear. Typically, Powder Rooms do not have a shower or tub, hence, the artwork will not be at risk from an abundance of moisture.  A well-appointed Powder Room can easily be transformed into a “gem box” of a private art gallery. 

 Silhouettes from London. 

Once, as I was a dinner party guest at a distinguished historic house, a stunning “art” discovery was made.  During cocktail hour, the Director of a prestigious art museum returned from the Powder Room and asked the host what he knew about the watercolor hanging near the sink.  “Yes, it was purchased by my grandfather years ago on his travels,” he responded. The signature was diminutive and hard to decipher. The Director recognized the artwork, which was painted by a world-famous artist and was exceptionally valuable.  Now, this is another reason to hang artwork in your Powder Room.  It may be discovered as being more prized than you could ever imagine!

Powder Rooms tend to be rather feminine in decor, but not ours!  Because Fox Hall, our c. 1803 house, was built before indoor plumbing, our Powder Room was cleverly slipped in under the main staircase.  The door leading into it is part of the Hunt Room bookcase. The dark green Scalamandre wallpaper with Jack Russell terriers seemed fitting to complement the burgundy walls and horsey theme for the  Hunt Room.  The artwork displayed has an intriguing story of how and why we collected it.

The art you display will create a brief and unique experience for your guests to relish and remember.  Choose an exceptional mirror and soft lighting for your Powder Room.

The pilot episode for my public television series, You Are Cordially Invited, was filmed at a grand house, Eyrie Knoll, in West Hartford, Connecticut.  The Sullivans’ attention to detail in every room was exemplary. Their distinguished collection of du Paquier porcelain (Vienna 1719) was once a featured exhibition at The Metropolitan Museum.  When Julia Child was a dinner guest, she exclaimed that their Powder Room was the most beautifully, well-appointed one she had ever visited. Note the hand-painted design on the wood floor and cabinet, the attractive mirror, and the shaded electric candlelights. 

Grandmillennial Tips:

Remember, the paint or wallpaper colors in your Powder Room should complement the artwork and adjoining room. Create a calm but captivating oasis for your guests. 

Whether you have a collection of museum-worthy artwork, or simply hang a multitude of porcelain birds on wall brackets, framed children’s artwork, or a collection of something meaningful, consider salon-style hanging as an option, where the sky's the limit. The walls can be adorned from top to bottom!

Xx 

Holly 

Bridal Pictures: How and Where to Display Them!

The Smoking Room at Highclere Castle features a console table behind the sofa, sprinkled with stunning bridal pictures of various relatives.

A lovely tradition in classically designed houses is a table devoted to bridal photographs as an homage to various brides within the family tree. In the past, the assembled portraits only featured the bride in a formal black-and-white pose, but they have now morphed into pictures of the bride and groom in black-and-white and also in color.

The Duchess’s butter-yellow sitting room in the Private Apartments at Blenheim Palace in Woodstock, England, ranks as one of the most beautifully appointed rooms I have ever seen. While filming my television program there, I admired the magnificent bridal photograph of Lady Henrietta Spencer-Churchill and her other relatives as brides on the table behind me. 

Bridal photographs are traditionally grouped together and displayed in the living room on a side table, a grand piano, or a table behind a sofa. Formal bridal portrait photographs in English country houses and palaces are traditionally black and white or in a sepia tone. 

The formality of the house and the photograph dictate the style of the picture frame, which can be ornate or sleek and modern. The most traditional bridal picture frame is sterling silver or silver-plated. A French enamel frame is another stunning choice. Italian fine leather with gold embellishments or antique gilded frames are other options. 

It was an honor to tour the ravishing Rienzi House at the Museum of Fine Arts in Houston, Texas, with Carroll Goodman, the granddaughter of the owners who built it. Carroll wore her mother’s wedding gown, and this charming tradition continues with other brides in her family line. The antique console table in the living room features several family bridal portraits, including Carroll.  

In my book, The Pretty and Proper Living Room, I discuss how and where to engrave a silver picture frame.  If the wedding photograph is just of the bride, then a monogram with her new married name initials is in order. If it is of the husband and wife, then their joint initial monogram is appropriate. The wedding date is a lovely addition, too.

Xx

Holly

PS: Please be a dear and inspire a friend to subscribe today!  

Wedding Wisdom Part II: What No-No's to Know!

Our joyful wedding day was almost 49 years ago, at The Country Club of Virginia in Richmond. I was thrilled and honored to wear my mother-in-law’s wedding gown. Our get-away car? A Bell helicopter picked us up on the putting green by the terrace (that would never happen today!). Then, we were off to Bermuda to begin our married lives together. 

Why is June the most popular month for getting married? 

June is derived from Juno, the goddess of marriage and the protector of women. A wedding in June is considered auspicious, so the couple will be blessed with happiness! 

How grateful I am to have such a tradition-minded, international audience who takes the time to share their thoughts and experiences with me!

Case in point: while wearing an ALL-white outfit as a guest attending a wedding in the USA is a no-no, bridesmaids have often worn white in British weddings. The Late Queen Elizabeth II chose white for her bridesmaids, which continues to be a common practice in the UK. Royal wedding participants, i.e., Maid of Honor, Bridesmaids, and usually the children. It is a tradition from centuries ago when they believed white would repel evil spirits. I did not explain this before, so thank you, B.M. and L.C. 

Wish to hear more wedding no-no’s?  

Here are a few that you kindly shared with me: 

~ The biggest no-no in my mind is to accept an invitation and then not show up… especially considering the cost of a sit-down dinner!  

 J.M. 

~ Arriving late to a marriage ceremony is a no-no! Guests, please plan to arrive at least 20 minutes early so that you may be escorted to your seat and not hold up the ceremony. 

P.S.

~ Please tell guests to send their wedding gifts sooner rather than later. Send your wedding gift within a week or two after you have received your invitation! Bringing a gift to the reception is a no-no; a bride should not be burdened with organizing the delivery of any presents from the reception venue.  Also, I am a recent bride, and getting a thank-you note out before the wedding versus after is much easier!

A.C.
~ It is a no-no to make the bride inquire about who may have sent a gift, so be sure your card is securely attached.

B.D.

~ Ask the bride or mother of the bride the best address to send your gift. The address on the invitation and response envelope may be the address of the bride's parents or even the wedding planner. It may be easier for the bride to have the gift sent to her address instead!

A.M.H. 
 

Thank you all for inspiring others to subscribe to my newsletter—wow!! 

Please know how grateful I am to you for being so graciously appreciative and supportive. 

Sending pink wishes,

xx

Holly

Wedding Guest No-No's: What you need to know!

The bells of the Berlin Dom were ringing as Alexandra and Maximilian walked down the stairs after their wedding ceremony 17 years ago!  

Love, laughter, and a “happily ever after!”

It’s June, the month of roses and weddings! 

Being a guest at a wedding is a treat, but more importantly, witnessing a marriage ceremony is an honor.

Several mother-of-the-bride subscribers have shared their experiences with me about what a guest should NOT do at a wedding!  Weddings are truly personal. Times have changed, from pink wedding dresses to ceremonies under the sea. Today, anything goes.  But for those of you whom cherish tradition, here are some “No-Nos,” as a little reminder, for guests attending a wedding.  

No-no: To not follow the dress code.
 

What IS done: When in doubt, contact the bride or the mother of the bride to determine what to wear. If the invitation indicates a term you are unsure of, such as “resort chic,” be sure to ask what is expected for attire!
 

No-No:  For a lady guest to wear ALL white.
 

What IS done: Accessorizing with white is fine, but an all-white outfit is reserved for the bride. (Yet when Catherine Middleton, now the Princess of Wales, was a bride, her sister Pippa wore an all-white gown… times are a-changin!)  Also, refrain from wearing black. Why? It is a joyous day of celebration, so choose your dress with that in mind. You may wish to inquire what color the bridesmaids will be wearing, so you will not be wearing the same color. 
 

No-No:  To ask if you may give a toast at the last minute.
 

What IS done:  If you wish to give a toast, ask the bride and groom for their blessing well in advance of the wedding.  Toasts are traditionally delivered by the bride's father, the best man and the maid of honor, and are planned before the wedding date.

Our son, Stuart III, and his new wife, Karen, joyfully departed The Everglades Club in Palm Beach. Their wedding inspired me to write my second book, Pearls of Palm Beach. 

No-No:  To say “congratulations” to the bride.
 

What IS done: Say “best wishes” to the bride. Why?  “Congratulations” is reserved for the groom because he was fortunate to have “caught and married” such a lovely lady. This is an old Victorian tradition. Yet, it continues in old-school etiquette.  As an alternative, guests may extend their “best wishes” to both the bride and groom. 
 

No-No: To wear sunglasses in church or during any professional wedding photographs. 
 

What IS done: An old-school rule of thumb: don’t wear sunglasses to a wedding ceremony or reception. But, in this age, sunglasses are permissible on a sunny day outside, but kindly remove them when asked to be in a photo. 
 

No-No: To take photographs in the church.
 

What IS done:  A photographer has been hired by the bride to document the wedding ceremony, so let them do their job. As a guest, your responsibility is to show up and respectfully savor the ceremony with your eyes. Take photos after the ceremony outside of the church or ceremony venue.

 

No-No: To keep your cell phone on during the marriage ceremony in a church or any venue. 
 

What IS done: Turn your phone to silent. Also, without “vibration mode” because subtle noises can be distracting during the marriage ceremony. 
 

No-No: To post photographs of the wedding without first asking permission from either the bride, groom, or mother of the bride.

Our youngest daughter, Caroline and her new husband, Edward, departing Marble House in Newport, Rhode Island.

What IS done: It is always thoughtful to ask before posting. The bride may want to choose from her professional photographs to be posted first on social media on their actual wedding day. 
 

No-No: To take flowers from the reception tables after the reception.
 

What IS done: If you have been invited to take the flowers, then, do so.
 

No-No: To not promptly (within one week) R.s.v.p. to the wedding reception invitation.
 

What IS done:  Respond to the wedding invitation as soon as possible (preferably within 48 hours) of receiving your reply card. This tends to be the biggest challenge for brides and requires them to reach out to guests before the wedding date to get an accurate headcount. 
 

No-No: To indicate a “wedding gift registry” on a wedding or bridal shower invitation. 
 

What IS done: Guests may contact the bride or the shower hosts and ask where the bridal couple is registered. A wedding website, which can include their registry, may be indicated on the “Reserve the Date” card. 
 

No-No: Asking to bring a guest (someone other than the person indicated on the invitation envelope) is a no-no.
 

What IS done: Honor and respect whoever is indicated on the invitation. If your children or “and Guest” is not mentioned, they are not invited. 
 

No-No: To change your place card seating at your assigned reception table.
 

What IS done:  You have been placed where you are for a reason! No matter how tempting it is to change your seating to be close to friends or whomever, do not. Honor your seating assignment. Then, once the meal ends, you can excuse yourself to the dance floor and mingle with others. 
 

No-No: To stay seated when the bride enters the church. 
 

What IS done: Standing is a show of respect and admiration.  Keep your eyes on the mother of the bride.  When she stands, the guests should stand. If she stays seated, the guests should conform and follow suit. 

Stuart and I hold hands when the bride and groom say their vows. It's our quiet way of acknowledging our vows for each other. Cheers to joyful wedding ceremonies!

Xx

Holly

Holly's secret "white" trim paint color!

Choosing the appropriate white paint color for your wood trim is worth your time and consideration. The color shown on the pediment and trim around the c.1803 mahogany door at Fox Hall is my secret “white” paint color!

Dear Ones, 

May I ask you a BIG favor? I have been given a challenge, and I need your assistance to accomplish it! Could you please help me double my 20K subscribers for “Secrets to Lovely Living” by inviting one or two friends and family to subscribe? I know I can meet this challenge with your help… pretty please. 

Xx Holly

Now, let’s talk white paint!

There are a myriad of “white” paint color options. I am frequently asked what my favorite white paint color is for walls, ceilings, and wood trim.  Because “white” paints can have hidden undertones that tend to be cold or warm, it can be challenging to decipher which white to choose. 

So, what is my secret, tried-and-true white paint color for trim?  

It is Benjamin Moore: White Dove OC-17. 

Why do I specify White Dove?

White Dove’s tonality brings softness and warmth to an interior while still looking white. It works exceptionally well in historic houses. I have it on the trim in ALL of our houses and specify it for my client's newer houses, too.

What trim paint finish do I prefer?

A semi-gloss finish on the wood trim in most rooms and a high-gloss finish for the trim and cabinetry in kitchens, children’s rooms, sunrooms, and bathrooms. 

Why do I specify Benjamin Moore's paint?

It is durable and fade-resistant, has superior coverage, expands and contracts with weather fluctuations, and is rich in pigment. From experience, I think their color swatches and paint fan-deck colors are exceptionally accurate, making my job easier. 

Here are a few other “Holly” options for Benjamin Moore (BM) whites for trim and walls:

BM White Dove OC-17 When I want white walls, I use this in a flat finish and on the ceiling to match the walls. 

BM Opal White OC-73 is a soft, pastel peachy-pink that enhances anyone’s complexion!

I like it on walls in a flat finish, with White Dove semi-gloss on the trim. This very becoming color is on my office and dressing room walls!

BM Linen White 92 is a warm beige. 

Linen White is on the walls in the baby’s room at Fox Hall in a flat finish, with a semi-gloss White Dove on the trim, which complements the celadon floral chintz on the curtains and bed hangings. Our carriage house, Little Fox, also has Linen White on most walls, with White Dove on the trim, keeping it all neutral for the Airbnb tenants. 

BM Super White 02 has a cool tonality and works well for more modern interiors, both on the walls and the trim.  

BM Atrium White OC-145 is creamy with peachy undertones.  

BM China White OC-141 has a grey tonality.  It works with grey and black accents.

My office at Fox Hall has flat Opal White on the walls and ceiling, with semi-gloss White Dove trim.

I had the furniture lacquered in Palm Beach in glossy White Dove, which blends in with the bedroom's White Dove trim.

White Dove, in a flat finish, is lovely on walls and ceilings, especially when the wood trim color contrasts, as exemplified in our Living Room at Fox Hall.

GrandMillennial Tips:

The best way to accurately see the complexity and true tonality of any white color you choose is to place your “white” color swatch, or the actual paint, on white printer paper. It will reveal its true color right before your eyes.

When painting your house, try to use the same color for ALL of the trim! This makes it effortless to touch it up at any time. Between vacuum cleaner bumps and shoe knicks on the stair risers, there are never-ending touchups at Fox Hall. This family house is happily “lived in” with eight grandchildren, a dog, a gardening husband, and constant entertaining! 

If your trim is in White Dove, paint your ceiling in a flat White Dove to blend in with the White Dove on the trim. 

So, what is your go-to “white” for trim and walls? I’d love to know!

What is my “secret pink” for the Living Room walls at Petite Fox in Palm Beach?

BM 2078-80 Pink Peony, cut 50% with white!  I use a flat finish on the walls, with White Dove semi-gloss on the trim. Then, I have the BM 2078-80 made in an even softer shade for the ceiling, so it is cut with 75% white, which gives the ceiling just a hint of pink!  

It has been an honor to share my “secrets” with you. Thank you again for helping me to meet my challenge to double my subscriber numbers. I know we can do it!  

Xx 

Holly

Grosgrain Glamour! A timeless and tailored decorative trim.

A simple, quietly understated 1” wide grosgrain ribbon trim adds a tailored touch to a classic Bob Collins chintz dust ruffle in Palm Beach. 

What decorative trim is timeless, tailored, and unbelievably cost-effective?  It is used to enhance curtains, valances, upholstery, pillows, dust ruffles, and it even graces dresses, hats, shoes, and ponytails.

It is a grosgrain ribbon! (Pronounced: GROW-grain)

Grosgrain is a very versatile ribbon. It has a distinctive ribbed texture which also serves to enhance its durability, more so than satin or silk ribbons. Its matte finish is not flashy, making it a quiet classic. 

I have used Samuel & Sons grosgrain ribbons for years for my clients.  This kind of ribbon can also be easily obtained on the internet, like this roll of 2” white ribbon.

Grosgrain in the 17th century referred to a garment fabric that was black and durable.  In the 1920s “grosgrain ribbon” was introduced, and now, there are a multitude of colors and printed designs available. 

I like to think of grosgrain ribbon as having a “distinguished appearance.” It continues to embellish evening wear, like the bow on a gentleman’s formal black evening pumps.

It was love at first sight when Stuart purchased these shoes in London for me with the pink grosgrain ribbon bow! 

Consider applying a 1” to 2” wide grosgrain ribbon along the leading edge and bottom hemline of your curtain panels.  Choose a complementary color to the fabric design or room scheme… or simply choose a neutral color, like white. 

These curtain pull-panels have 1½” white grosgrain ribbon. It is applied one inch off of the leading edge of the panels.  

I specify a grosgrain ribbon trim to be sewn about ½” to 1 ½” off the leading edges on a curtain panel.  Where it is placed depends on the pattern of the fabric, the height of the room, and the width of the curtains. Two or more smaller ribbons can be added, too. 

This grosgrain ribbon has “picot” edges which adds a touch of femininity. This bow pulls back the bed hangings on my daughter’s bed at Fox Hall. 

Have fun, be clever, and think outside of the box when designing with grosgrain ribbon.  Ever since I was sixteen, I have applied grosgrain to my dress designs and hairbands… I never tire of it! 

XX

Holly

PS Please be a dear.... share this with a friend and inspire them to subscribe! 

The secret to properly popping a champagne bottle cork!

Pink champagne is traditionally served at Fox Hall for just about any occasion! 

When champagne is served, it instantly becomes a celebration!  Our daughter, Alexandra, and her husband, Maximilian, are hosting a Black-tie celebratory party here in Berlin. It is a “Trifecta,” as both their birthdays and anniversary are all within one week of each other in May! 

My granddaughter offered to help serve champagne, so the topic arose: How does one properly pop the cork on a bottle of bubbly?  

I have observed my darling husband open countless champagne bottles throughout the years. His technique is quiet and the popped cork remains in his hand. One may think that the loud “POP” sound, accompanied by a “darting cork" is the way it is done (as often portrayed in the movies) however, the quieter the “pop” of the cork, the more elegant “the pour!” 

So, how does one properly open a champagne bottle? Twist the bottle, NOT the cork! 

Champagne was created in France BY accident, and if you are not careful to remove the cork correctly, you can have AN accident!  The cork can become a dangerous projectile, a flying bullet.  The pressure behind a champagne cork is approximately 90 psi, equivalent to three times the pressure in a car tire!

As we arrived at Chateau de Villette, outside of Paris to attend a stunning wedding, we were greeted with gentlemen servers in the grand hall, who poured champagne into the quintessential “coupe” glass. This glass shape became fashionable in the 1700’s and has a unique history about its shape… that’s a whole other topic!

More secret champagne tips:

-Be sure the bottle is chilled, preferably to 45 degrees Fahrenheit.  

NOTE: if the bottle is NOT cold enough, the cork can release even more quickly because of the pressure inside the bottle. A bottle of champagne at room temperature has more pressure, which creates a bigger pop and more effervescent spray than a chilled bottle!

-Pop the cork away from anyone or anything valuable… no secret there! 

-Hold the bottle at a 45-degree angle. Untwist the wire cage counterclockwise, and lift it off while also keeping pressure on the cork. 

-Twist the bottom of the bottle, not the cork!  Keep pressure on the cork with your hand, and pull the bottle down as you twist it.  By twisting the bottle, you can control the release of the cork. 

GrandMillennial Tips:

Using a mixture of 50 percent water and 50 percent ice is an expedient way to quickly chill a bottle of champagne. Use this 50/50 mixture in a pretty ice bucket and fill it a third of the way up.

Draping a folded linen napkin over the cork while removing it is a simple and elegant precautionary measure.

Overlooking the stupendously beautiful gardens at historic Chateau de Villette while sipping French champagne was simply glorious and transported me to another time, one of pure elegance.  

My mother-in-law lovingly says, “Tiny bubbles taste better!”  She always has a few chilled bottles of champagne on hand to serve for any occasion. That’s a lovely gesture to adopt, right?!

Cheers to YOU from Berlin! I am most grateful for your enthusiastic support and wish you many joyful “bubbly” celebrations! 

XX

Holly

PS Please be a dear.... share this with a friend and inspire them to subscribe! 

A secret magic wand for "Brown Furniture!"

Here is the “after” photo of a bed that had “the secret magic wand” treatment!

Have you heard talk about how younger generations no longer want “brown furniture?” Yet, on the other hand, they want sustainable, good-for-the-environment furniture. Well, guess what? Using “brown furniture” is a way to go green! If you don’t like the brown color, then transform “brown” into something you’ll love and use. 

I’m not speaking about superlative antiques, but let’s say you have inherited a piece of furniture that has sentimental meaning to you but is… humdrum?  Or you have a piece of furniture that remains quietly sequestered in the garage or basement?  These are “Cinderella” pieces awaiting a magic wand to transform their beauty into showstopper caliber.  

Want a wand?  Here it is: lacquer paint!  Lacquer paint can immediately revamp any piece of wood furniture, even kitchen cabinets, because it instantly enhances their outer beauty. 

Can you see the outer beauty in this ugly stepsister, homely-looking bed?  It is the same, “fit for a princess”  bed shown above in lacquer with a semi-gloss finish! It is in “Dove White,” which is my go-to white.

Lacquer is thin in consistency, but stronger than paint. It can be tricky to apply because it dries very quickly, much faster than paint (hence it needs to be sprayed on). If not applied correctly, it can bubble and crack.  

Lacquer has a very durable finish and cures within 24 hours, whereas oil enamel paint can take weeks to cure. There are many versions of lacquer paint, and each artist uses their own formula. Experts in lacquer application know what combination works best for each specific application. 

To find an expert source that specializes in spraying lacquer paint, ask your local paint store such as Benjamin Moore or Sherwin Williams, or ask a designer for their recommendations. In Palm Beach, I worked with Javier Tovar who studied at Faux Effects International School.

I discovered this Asian-inspired curio cabinet at a W. Palm Beach consignment shop.  It is now black, high gloss lacquer with gold accents and is repurposed as a bar cabinet for our wine glasses. 

The two lacquer finishes that I specify are semi-gloss and high gloss, depending on the piece. Start your lacquer trial with a small piece of furniture to see how you like it, and then work up to larger, more significant pieces. 

A tired, old piece of furniture that is professionally lacquered can instantly metamorphose into a newer, younger-looking piece- consider it a “facelift” for brown furniture! Watch out… you may get hooked with this radiant transformation process. Lacquering pieces in white is perfect for tropical locales, such as Palm Beach!  

Xx 

Holly

PS Please be a dear.... share this with a friend and inspire them to subscribe! 

Have you named your house?!

With my affinity for foxes, an English painting of a running fox is prominently placed above the second landing in our front hall.  One of Fox Hall’s notable architectural triumphs are the two Palladian windows located on the same wall in the front hall.  It is one of the only houses in America with this distinctive feature.  The name we chose included “hall” and hence,“Fox + Hall” was a fitting appellation for our home. 

When my daughter Alexandra lived in England with her husband, both of their houses came with a name.  It was then that I realized that an English country house is actually required to have a name. The house name is used as the mailing address versus a house number and street address as we do in America. 

Create a name for your house or apartment and have fun with it! 

For two hundred years, our c.1803 house has historically been referred to as the General Soloman Cowles house, and it will always be associated with the house, but we created our own name, Fox Hall soon after we moved in twenty-five years ago. 

On the cover of my “Pearls of Palm Beach'' book is “The English House.” Their linen closet is filled with towels and linens embroidered with the house name, shown in the Darling Details section of my book. 

Not only is it delightfully dignified to have a name for your house, it is also a reason to have towels embroidered, stationery engraved, and a multitude of treasures created with the name and/or theme. From a doormat to a bespoke mailbox, tissue box, waste bin, ice bucket, butter mold, door knocker, and bookplates for your books, there are endless options! Create a name that you adore and that has a unique meaning to you, or has a historical reference. 

When we decided to name our carriage house, we took a family vote and “Little Fox” won.  The  same scenario for our abode in Palm Beach.  “Petite Fox” became the appointed name!

My embroiderer created a unique “Little Fox” design for the linens at our carriage house. 

Grandmillennial Tip:

Using the name of your house can be used to personalize gifts you give to others. We filmed the pilot TV show for my public television series in a stunning house in West Hartford, Connecticut. The owners gave me a limoge box as a memento gift which has a rendering of the house on the front and the house name they created, Eyrie Knoll, on the back. I smile at the memory it brings whenever I see it! 

What is your house name?!

Xx 

Holly

PS Please invite one friend to subscribe! Let’s keep the gracious living alive. 

Is Holly Holden a "dress" designer or an "interior" designer?

This was taken as we were filming an episode of my PBS series in the Drawing Room at Highclere Castle, aka Downton Abby. As a designer, I was enamored with the silk damask wall upholstery, matching curtains and stunning tassels, all of which were a gift to the 5th Countess of Carnarvon by her father, Alfred de Rothschild.

Photo credit: Deb Key

Storytime… a mini peek about me, so pour a cup of tea!

Quite often, I am asked “when and why” I began to design dresses, especially since my business is interior design. Well, it is probably not what you think- I have been designing dresses for longer than you may imagine. Here is my story: 

My darling Daddy, whom I loved and adored, died suddenly from a heart attack when I was sixteen… I was devastated. On top of that challenge, my Mum did not have access to any money in the bank for over six months because of a mistake the bank made. I never understood why,  but it happened, and she was too proud to let her family help us. 

During that time, I was invited to dances, debuts, and cotillions, which required a long and short party dress wardrobe. It was time to make lemonade out of lemons!

Our neighbor knew how to sew, so I asked her to teach me. As a novice, I thought it would be “easy peasy.”  “I’ll start with a dress,” right? I worked diligently on the pretty pink (a given!)  silk fabric. I never thought to try it on until I finished inserting the final touch: the gosh-darn zipper. I was so proud and excited until… I tried it on. “Dolly-size” comes to mind; that is how small the neck was! Live and learn. 

Practice, practice… before long, I could make a skirt in an hour and a long gown in a day. I added grosgrain ribbon embellishments and a small bow to the back of my creations. I adored going to the fabric store, choosing the fabric and decorative ribbon details, and creating my signature “Holly” designs. 

A Christmas article for Town & Country magazine at The Homestead in Hot Springs, Virginia featured my daughter, Alexandra and me. I designed and created my black velvet and gold embroidered brocade ballgown. 

Then, as a bride of 21 on a limited budget, I continued my sewing creativity, from colorful saddle pads for my horse to formal swag and jabot curtains for our CT historic houses, to Lilly Pulitzer fabric dresses, and brocade ballgowns. 

When our three children were young, I started an evening handbag business made of woven grosgrain ribbons. 

Learning how to sew turned out to be a lifetime gift. When I started my interior design business at age 35, I knew how to communicate with seamstresses and upholsterers. I understood fabrics, linings, and trims. I studied dress and curtain designs up close at every historical museum, couture store, or 5-star hotel we visited in Europe and took notes on how they were fabricated. 

Between my business and busy family, I had to stop sewing altogether. But a decade ago, my sweetheart husband, Stuart, indulged me and introduced me to his Hong Kong tailor on a splendid trip there, and encouraged me to design dresses with him. Oh, this tailor could execute masterful details, just like the well-made suits he created! We then began to meet two times a year. I would sketch out my vision and choose the fabric, and his workroom would then create each piece with precision and flair. 

Maria Pucci of Gramercy Atelier discovered me on Instagram three years ago and reached out. We met in Palm Beach at the Brazilian Court Hotel. I saw firsthand her magnificent bespoke creations at her trunk show. Maria is known for her custom designs, especially for the Mother of the Bride, special occasion dresses, and jackets. Her classic designs and attention to detail spoke to me. I had met my twin and we just HAD to work together! Her workroom could create my dresses for a larger audience. 

So, in January 2024, we collaborated together to create the “Holly Holden Collection '' with some of Gramercy Atelier's signature fabrics and styles as part of the collection- a dream come true for me.  We designed 12 pieces which includes my signature dresses available as a ready to wear collection online at Gramercy Atelier’s website.

Our first parlay was the ballgown I designed as the Chair of the Palm Beach Salvation Army’s Centennial White-tie “Paradise Ball.”  She had a muslin mock-up made and sent it to me in CT. I  modeled it, and we made a few tiny tweaks easily over FaceTime. I sent the sample dress back to her workroom in NYC. A few weeks later, I received the finished ballgown in the mail. It fit me with kid-glove perfection! (See the video of my HH Collection below)

I named each dress after stylishly “generous to charity” Palm Beach philanthropists from the 1960s. My dresses represent timeless and classic designs and are elegantly chic and feminine.

Take a peek at the collection HERE. Various colors and options are also available. What a joy it would be to know you are wearing one of my creations! I would be so grateful if you would help me introduce my collection worldwide.

Xx 

Holly

PS: Please be a dear and forward this to a friend who may be “on the hunt” for a pretty dress for a special occasion! 

Holly's Secrets to a Memorable Dinner Party!

Mummy always said, Everything tastes better in candlelight!” And, I do believe it does! 

Some hosts have a natural affinity for hosting memorable dinner parties effortlessly. Within moments of arriving at a home, you know whether it will be a jolly affair… or not.

I was asked what two elements a successful host should strive to master: joyful energy and elegant ease! 

I realize how fortunate I was to observe my parents, who entertained constantly. We moved worldwide, and within two weeks, Mummy would host an elegant dinner party with ease… she had a gift.   So, by osmosis, mimic, and practice, I learned.  Stuart and I love to entertain. Several of you nudged me to share a few of our secret tricks! 

Moments before our guests arrive:

We savor a few cherished moments and sip a glass of wine in anticipation of our guests' arrival. This is not always easy to accomplish, as there are always last-minute details one must attend to, right?!  But, it is well worth the effort, if possible. We enjoy each other and admire the house's appearance in eager anticipation of our guests, before the party commences. 

-Stuart selects the wines and will always pre-pour some glasses of red, white and also, some pink champagne and then, places them on a table near the door so he can greet guests with a glass of their choice straight away. Or, they can choose another drink to bring to them. By having a few glasses pre-poured, it is seamless to offer a drink to an arriving guest. (Let’s get this party started!) 

Cocktail Hour: 

~ If a guest has sent flowers in advance, I thank them and acknowledge the gift when they arrive. 

-Have vases readily available should a guest arrive with cut flowers from their garden. 

-When receiving a hostess gift, I thank them and place it on a nearby chair or table. You only need to open it after they leave. Your job is to greet guests.

~Most people like to stand and mingle because  know they will be seated and stationary at dinner. Let them stand! Others may choose to sit down.

~People like to be close together; “herd animals” comes to mind! Let them be close!  I laugh out loud because the hallway at Fox Hall is rawwther spacious, yet time and time again, I find clumps of guests squeezed next to one another inside the living room and hallway doorways. This is a natural instinct. Let them be! 

-Turn the lights down exceptionally LOW, or turn them off, and light the candles in the dining room. Guests glow under candlelight! 

After you light your candles, turn the lights off or dim them so the candlelight creates an enchanting space to dine. 

~ To announce that dinner is being served, I go to the kitchen, retrieve the antique Swiss cowbell our daughter, Alexandra, gave us, and start ringing it as I walk toward the guests. It is loud yet charming! (In Palm Beach, I use my little red tinkling Salvation Army bell!) This tradition of ringing a bell always brings a smile and a sense of excitement for the next chapter of the evening.

Dinner:

~ Use place cards for your dinner guests or use my unique seating assignment technique.

~ PS Guests: Always keep a place card at your assigned seat; NEVER move it!

~ Have a tray of chocolates, candied ginger, or something sweet to pass after everyone has finished their dessert. It is unexpected, and most guests happily indulge! 

~ Invite your guests to make a wish! As we adjourn to the next room, I occasionally invite lingering guests to choose a candle on the table and blow it out. A few of them stay, close their eyes, and blow the flame while wishing; it is such a sweet gesture. (By the way, this is an important, non-negotiable tradition that our children and grandchildren take VERY seriously. I often have to relight candles so everyone gets a wish. Little Stuie IV insists I light it several times… for many wishes!)

~ If you adjourn into another room for coffee or brandy, at some point, serve old-fashioned cocktail glasses filled with ice water or Perrier to your guests.  Late in the evening, water is always appreciated.

Departure:

~ If you have additional cookies or sweets, wrap them up (preferably have this done before your party) and give them to your guests upon departure. 

~ Always walk your guests to the door or elevator to say goodbye.  If it is a single lady or elderly guest, the host should accompany them to the car.  

Nighty-Night!

Take a moment to relish the evening before you go to bed.  If you have staff to clean the dishes, lovely, but if not, do them in the morning. End your evening with happiness in your heart before you collapse into bed and count your blessings! 

Xx 

Holly 

Avert Dinner Party Dilemmas: Ask your guests this question!

My carrot soup with fresh ginger makes an easy first course to serve and is a perfect option for any vegetarian guest. 

Many years ago, in my entertaining roster of memories, I learned a valuable lesson, one I wish to pass along to you!  When you invite guests to your house for dinner (or any meal for that matter), once they accept, I urge you to then ask them “THE question”: 

“Do you have any food allergies or dislikes?!”

Oh boy, I learned this the hard way. At one of our first big dinner parties Stuart and I hosted years ago, I made my foolproof beef tenderloin with a bearnaise sauce… divine, right? Well, JUST as our ten guests were seated at the table and dinner was being served, one couple announced that they were vegetarians! Really? Why did they not advise me of this when they accepted my invitation? It is the guest’s responsibility to tell the host.

What did I do? It just so happened that I had a box of organic butternut squash soup. (Adding a few red pepper flakes and a dash of Madeira wine, it tastes delicious… in a pinch!) I asked our server to warm up the soup and serve it to them. Phew, my “hostess dilemma” was diverted. From that day on, I always ask the guests “THE question” once they accept my invitation. 

Once, I was planning to serve my chicken cordon bleu recipe, which is rolled in a mustard and sour cream sauce and then breaded. I found out that one of my guests was allergic to mustard… go figure, mustard?! (No cordon bleu for you- change of menu!)  One only knows what allergies someone has if they ask, or if the guest offers to share with the host in advance. 

I would rather know if someone doesn't like something, too. If you don’t like lamb or lima beans, you are probably not going to tell me that in advance unless I ask you. Once I know your dislikes, I can try to accommodate and change the menu. 

GrandMillenial Tips:

~It is your responsibility as a guest to tell your host if you have allergies or are vegetarian, etc.  The purpose of their invitation is for you to have a most enjoyable experience.

~It is a good idea to have a vegetarian, quick and easy backup to serve.For example, a baked squash or additional vegetables….or, you can always just give a double portion of your mashed potatoes!

Here is one of my secret go-to recipes for an hors d’oeuvres:

~Many people now have wheat or gluten allergies, so I substitute bread rounds with cucumber rounds for one of my favorite, one-bite, passed hors d’oeuvres.  I thinly slice the cucumber rounds, spread them with chive Boursin cheese, place a piece of smoked salmon on top, along with a few capers on top of the salmon (and a tiny sprig of fresh dill if I have it).  Ladies love it because cucumbers have fewer calories than bread. It is always a winner!

I hope you will forward this to your darling friends and family.  By asking guests about allergies or food dislikes in advance, it may save you, and your guests too, from an uncomfortable and unnecessary “sticky situation.” 

Allergies or not, what host doesn’t love a party that is joyful, seamless, and filled with merriment for their guests? Cheers to that!

Xx 

Holly

The Art of Reciprocation: Inspiring Responses!

Serving pink champagne is a festive way to commence a ladies' luncheon, but an elegant and easy alternative, which is not expensive, is cranberry juice and soda water.

Last week I touched on reciprocation, “the forgotten art of hospitality,” and you, my dear subscribers, are passionate about it! 

I received more letters than ever in favor of this simple principle of giving and receiving… and the lack of it in today’s society. Today, I am featuring just a few heartfelt notes I received to confirm that you are not alone; reciprocity reflects the basic human desire to create a sense of balance and fairness in our social interactions!  And it does not have to cost a fortune to reciprocate hospitality. Take a peek…

Dear Holly,

This topic never seems to be discussed—thank you for sharing your commentary.  I, at one time, thought I had too many expectations for reciprocation. However, as my mother would say, it is simply “good form” to return a lovely time with a lovely time.  It is the ultimate thank-you note and an acknowledgment of generosity.  

I appreciate all of your posts! Thank you again. 

R.K.

Dear Holly, 

I enjoyed the topic in your column today. I have experienced the same lack of courtesy so many times. Even in the 80s, my parents would wonder why so many people attended their parties and never contacted them again.

These days, there seems to be an even more significant lack of empathy towards others. Many times, I throw parties with an RSVP request, and people can't even respond with a yes or no. When you're inviting 30-40 people over, this poses a problem. I've had people show up for a party wearing clothes so casual that I wouldn't even wear them to bed, much less a party. (In that instance, these guests left early, a little embarrassed.)  

Most people do not even think to ask, "Is there anything I can bring?"  It is even rare to get an email thank you after the event.  

I put this thoughtless behavior down to the following:

1. Lack of civility in our country in general

2. A multitude of distractions, giving people the idea that a party or dinner is on par with watching a show on NetFlix, always available at the touch of the remote!

3. Emphasis on 24/7 work demands in some people's lives.

My best,

L.H.

Dear Holly,

Ahh, another HH Monday morning home run !!! Thank you for addressing this topic. Reciprocation and handwritten thank-you notes are becoming a lost art. When I first came to PB I was perplexed I would invite people for drinks or a meal in my home. Rarely did I get invited into theirs. I assumed nobody in PB entertained at home, just at a club or restaurant. I concluded reciprocation at home was a northern custom. I have maintained for decades; please invite me to your home. It's about sharing your space. It's fine to open a jar of pasta sauce; the point is reciprocation!! You don't need fancy stemware or a grand entertainment space. It's about inviting me into your home. This is similar to the lost art of a thank you note, which has been replaced by a text. So sad. Thank you again.

D.Q.

I truly enjoy arranging flowers for centerpieces, but a flowering plant, a sculpture, or a porcelain soup tureen is less expensive and an elegant and easy alternative. 

Dearest Holly,

I am just tickled that you wrote about this.  I had limited money early in my fledgling career as an Industrial Designer.  Fortunately, I was taken under the wing of two older couples of great wealth and experience.  Both lived in several international metropolitan areas, however, in apartment buildings with little access to land.  As these two couples loved to garden, they spent many happy times in my garden and, afterward, cooking together.  This was several decades ago, and we are still close friends to this day.  Happily, they taught me the art of more sophisticated entertaining throughout the years, on my Queen Victoria wedding china!

There are many things you can do to reciprocate, even when you are young and on limited budgets. The key is not to be intimidated by a temporary lack of means.

Your information is incredibly helpful to others.   Never stop!  

Warm wishes,

LGS.

Dear Holly,  

I believe many people think they have to "spend” to make an impression.  It is not about money,  but a bit of freshness, kind thought, creativity, and confidence to show others you care about them. You are a super mentor to many of us, especially the Grand Millenials.  So grateful you purport all things both proper and pragmatic.

Best wishes, 

L.

Hi Holly,

Your column today was excellent. I thought it was just me hosting with friends who were not reciprocating. Thank you for clarifying and helping me understand that I am not alone.

Happiness, B.G.

Dear Holly,

Yes, yes!!!

We have lively nieces, nephews, and friends of our children who reciprocate in many charming, simple ways—for example, a walk and tea on an afternoon!

You are right on, as usual!

Bises,

S.

Pink silk “faux thistles” are interspersed with real flowers in this arrangement to symbolize Scotland for a luncheon in honor of HM King Charles III’s charity, The King’s Foundation, when the CEO and staff visited Palm Beach. Secret: In a pinch, mixing faux flowers with real flowers can be an elegant and easy, less expensive filler for an arrangement. 

Dear Holly,

This month’s edition struck home. My husband and I host several large gatherings a year, Halloween, Christmas, Mid-summer, and more intimate dinner parties. We are increasingly struck by the number of couples who do not reciprocate. It does seem to be an emerging cultural trend, which is unfortunate.

As you mentioned, we have friends who have issues with renovations, dogs, etc. and choose not to entertain in their homes. Many of these friends will meet out for dinner or at a club, an acceptable alternative to entering their homes. However, there is a second category of people who we enjoy spending time with and who obviously enjoy themselves when they are entertained in our home. Yet, no effort is ever made to reciprocate.

I am always bowled over when someone, often a female contemporary, shares feelings of inadequacy or intimidation when faced with the thought of reciprocation. I always reply that simplicity is best, and any invitation is appreciated. Life is too short to feel like you must meet some unrealistic ideal. A burger in the backyard is a welcome invite, as it shows effort.

I have always acknowledged that friendship is hard work. People ebb and flow in and out of our lives over time. If they are unable, or worse unwilling, to put in the effort required to maintain a connection, it can become necessary to edit some connections.

Thank you for your inspired missives, I do enjoy reading them.

K.H.

Dear Ms. Holden,

Thank you very much for writing about reciprocity. I thought it was just me who thought about this with friends, so it is nice to read about the "Art of Hospitality." 

Have a wonderful week! 

Sincerely, 

L.K.

Dear Holly,

Well said! Wonderful to have reminders about mutual respect in society. These ideas deserve attention, and the art of gracious living must be preserved!

Thank you for passing these ideas on to future generations!

S.S.

Dear Holly,

I’m passing your timely article to a few friends. Thank you for reminding us politeness begins at home!

A fan, V.

These are just a few of the letters I received.  It is obvious that many of us still want to keep gracious entertaining and reciprocity alive and well… thank heavens!

Xx

Holly

Reciprocation: A Forgotten Art of Hospitality?

Serving guests in the summer on our veranda at Fox Hall, for dinner parties of six to ten, is an enchanting experience as a hostess… everything tastes better somehow, no matter what I serve! 

(Dress is Ala von Auersperg) 

A darling subscriber brought up an interesting topic: the “unwritten rule” of reciprocating hospitality. Is it a lost art?

Reciprocation, a gracious social norm, involves returning a favor or invitation.  It is an essential aspect of friendship. However, it is often overlooked in today’s society. I am speaking about social events, not business, and in particular, an intimate dinner party, not necessarily a large cocktail party or reception. 

My subscriber shared her personal experience: she and her husband have invited and hosted several couples to their dinner parties, who seemed to enjoy themselves thoroughly. However, over time, to their surprise, these guests have yet to extend an invitation in return. It is not because they didn’t have a delightful time; they gleefully accepted their invitations on more than one occasion! Why?

I remember when a dear friend of mine, who has a very grand house and entertains on a monumentally majestic scale, confessed that “no one ever seems to invite me back.”  Why? 

Are people intimidated, or can they not afford to reciprocate? Reciprocation does not have to be extravagant. Whether it is a simple lunch, tea, or drinks & nibbles, there are various ways to reciprocate based on one’s budget and lifestyle.  

Is it because people do not have time or cannot entertain in their home? I know a young couple with four children under four (two sets of twins!) who admitted their house is not a venue for entertaining (at this point in their lives). Instead, they invite guests to a restaurant or their Club. There are endless accessible alternatives.

So, why do people not reciprocate?  It is a taught behavior, like good manners. The genteel behavior of “paying back” is a learned concept. So, perhaps some “just never learned and don’t know,” OR some “just don’t care!”… oh dear! 

Grandmillennial tip:

If you meet someone for the first time at someone else’s place, and want to invite them over, invite the host of the party  where you met them as well; it is a thoughtful gesture. 

 Not reciprocating can be perceived as impolite and ungenerous. Teach your children that when you accept an invitation, it is your duty to reciprocate in some way or form, in the spirit of generosity and mutual respect for others. We are so grateful to have charming friends who kindly reciprocate! 

Let’s keep gentility alive and well… and not a lost art! 

Xx

Holly

PS Please pass this along to your grown children too, as a reminder to reciprocate!

Lovely Lobster Bisque: Elegant and Easy!

Cooking seafood in our apartment is a bit of a challenge compared to cooking seafood in our house, as the fishy aroma can linger for days. Even though the sliding doors are opened, and scented candles are lit, it does not seem to dissipate! So, when making a lobster bisque, I take an easy, “scent-free” shortcut! I buy it ready-made and add my special touches to make it “semi-homemade.”  

There are several places to buy yummy, premade lobster bisque that is refrigerated (and not in a can), such as Publix, Panera, and Costco. I simply add some Madeira wine to taste, along with a shake or two of red pepper flakes, to the store-bought bisque, slowly bring it to a simmer, and add "the secret" dollop of crab or lobster.   

Here are all of the ingredients! The pretty flowers were given to me by Joan Parker who arranged them at a Salvation Army fundraising event she hosted. 

My “Secret” Ingredients

Mix and simmer until warm:

• Premade and refrigerated Lobster Bisque

• Madeira Wine (to taste)

• Pepper flakes (to taste)

• Add in: Lump crabmeat OR picked-out lobster meat (approx ¼ cup per bowl)

• Garnish with chopped fresh dill, scallions, or chives

After the bisque has slowly come to a simmer on the cooktop (be careful not to let it boil),  spoon it into each soup bowl, and add a very generous spoonful of lump crab meat or picked-out lobster meat, which is at room temperature or gently warmed before adding it. 

Then, garnish with a sprinkling of chopped fresh dill, scallions, or chives on top.

The final touch?  I pass a petite silver pitcher (above) of additional Madeira wine. Each guest then has the option to pour a little on top of their bisque if they wish. (No one ever seems to refuse this embellishment!) 

Once the bisque is placed in front of each guest, a basket of warm biscuits is served to accompany it.  This easy, elegant, and deliciously decadent first-course combination of Lobster Bisque and biscuits is always a winner! 

Xx 

Holly

PS: Please share this recipe and inspire others to subscribe!  Also, take a peek at the addendum below. 

The Secret to Perfect Invitations: Where to place the R.s.v.p.

Two appropriate forms of requesting an acknowledgment are displayed on these invitations, both of which bring fond memories of joyous celebrations to mind! 

When composing an invitation, which side do you place the acknowledgment request, aka the R.s.v.p. (R.s.v.p. is French for “Respondez s’il vous plait”)? On the lower-right corner or the lower-left corner?

It should be on the lower-left corner of the invitation!

Respondez s’il vous plait may be written as R.s.v.p., with a capital “R” and lowercase “s.v.p.” The other form of R.S.V.P. is in all capital letters. The preferred form is R.s.v.p. 

“The favour of replay is requested” is another form of an acknowledgment request. It relays a touch of old-world charm and formality to the occasion. I chose this for my wedding reception invitation because the British spelling of “favour” reminded me of my dear father, who was British.

I sent this invitation to dear friends, “The Rambunctious Rams,” who celebrate Aries’ birthdays with my husband. It is always an amusing evening of celebration!

It is appropriate to use the simple phrase “Regrets only” along with a phone number, email address, or both. This form is considered less formal than using R.s.v.p.

When including a phone number, email address, or both, it is preferable to indicate them underneath the R.s.v.p.  

GrandMilennial Tip:

The “dress attire” is placed in the lower-right corner of an invitation and is always included on a formal invitation. (An easy way to remember this is: “How to dress RIGHT!”)

For informal invitations, you may add a response date under the R.s.v.p.   The number of the date may be spelled out or in numeral form: April 10th or April tenth. (If spelled out, the number is not capitalized,  but the month is capitalized) 

Example:
R.s.v.p.           
By April second 

Forbidden Faux Pas:

No-no: To not respond soon after receiving an invitation: Do your best to respond to an invitation within 2 to 3 days of receiving it. 

No-no: When a formal invitation, such as a wedding invitation, is sent and does not have a response card enclosed, you are expected to respond on your writing paper in the third person (Mrs. R. Stuart Holden, Jr. accepts with pleasure the kind invitation of…).  

No-no: If a response card is not included with the formal invitation, you should not phone or email your response, even if you know them well. Your response should always be handwritten and mailed to the host. 

Note the selective wording in the lower-left corner, which suggests a stately fundraising luncheon, with limited acceptances. This invitation included an acknowledgment request card. 

Please be a dear and invite one or two friends today to subscribe to “Secrets to Lovely Living!”  Your kind gesture would help me grow my subscriber list internationally and mean the world.  A big kiss to all for your support!  

Xx

Holly

Enhancing art with porcelain!

The blue tonality of the pair of Chinese ginger jars corresponds to a similar color in the painting by American artist Margot Stewart, while the two tall pairs of vases harmonize with the colors in the room.  

If paired well, porcelain and art can create a symphony of perceptible bliss for any room. Porcelain plates, vases, cachepots, and figurines add a lovely dimension to walls, shelves, and tabletops, enhancing the room's character and artwork. 

When porcelain pieces are chosen to complement a piece of art with specific colors in mind, the porcelain becomes part of the overall composition, and the artwork visually extends rays of intrigue toward a nearby piece of porcelain.  Thus, the entire composition expands and enhances viewers’ pleasure. A win-win!  This is a sound reason to buy what you love while keeping a room's color scheme in mind. 

This composition illustrates ‘art and porcelain’ complementing one another!

My favorite artwork at Hill-Stead Museum in Farmington, Connecticut, is Jockeys (1886) by Edgar Degas, which hangs over the dining room mantel. The mantelpiece is graced with the Pope Family collection of celadon porcelain pieces made during the Song (960-1279) and Ming (1368-1644) Dynasties. The mantelpiece was believed to be designed specifically to feature both the artwork and the celadon pieces… just what I am talking about! The harmony between the various pastel shades of green in the artwork and the soft green celadon porcelain is ‘art complementing art.’  

Porcelain has a most captivating history.  An entire chapter in my book, The Pretty and Proper Living Room, is dedicated to this topic. In summary, consider collecting porcelain with both the colors of your artwork and the colors of a room in mind so that the porcelain will meld brilliantly and enhance the overall visual aesthetic of your space.  

Surrounding art with porcelain plates is another way to add interest to the subject matter. The blue and white Meissen, Canton, and Willow Ware plate patterns complement the sweater on our son, Stuart III (with Higgins!), and our kitchen at Fox Hall.

Xx

Holly

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What secret elements contribute to an inviting interior? Lessons from the Mulroney's Palm Beach Home.

Upon entering a house for the first time, what elements do you immediately sense that contribute to a positively enchanting atmosphere? You know, a house that feels inviting, and one you don't want to leave?! 

My list of a few “inviting” elements:

-Joyful colors that complement one another from room to room

-Intimate seating arrangements

-Art that speaks to the heart and is collected with passion, and hung appropriately

-Decorative details that tell a story

I am reminded of the time my team and I photographed Brian and Mila Mulroney’s Palm Beach house for my book, Pearls of Palm Beach.

I immediately felt an overwhelming sense of warmth, happiness, and gracious hospitality the moment I walked through the front door. The happy, sunny yellow and Mediterranean blue color scheme delighted my visual senses. The living room seating arrangements were close together, conducive for intimate conversations. The artwork and decorative details reflected the Mulroney family interests, experiences, and travels. These elements contribute to an authentically inviting atmosphere.  

Mila entered soon after the cameras were set up. We met for the first time. She greeted me with her warm personality and beautiful smile; she made me feel like a long-lost friend. We had a quick photograph together before she dashed off with her grandchildren. She graciously invited me to “make myself at home.” No wonder she is so beloved! 

The secret to creating inviting interiors… the ones you never want to leave, is to create intimate rooms that reflect the persona and passions of the owners within them. The Mulroney's accomplished this brilliantly.  It’s a family home, where guests feel like family.  And, it's no wonder the house is appropriately named “La Maison Jolie!”

I was saddened to learn that Brian Mulroney, the former Prime Minister of Canada from 1984 to 1993, recently passed away. I was inspired to share a few photographs of the resort home he shared with Mila. We can all learn from these rooms. 

My heartfelt sympathy goes out to the Mulroney family. Thank you for sharing your charming family home with me. 

Xx

Holly

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